I didn’t know I’d still miss you. But I realize today I really do. And if I can just get back all those times and do it all over again, I would. In a heartbeat.
It’s a painful realization. That I still feel this way. And you don’t anymore.
Things change. Feelings change. Friendships change.
… I didn’t change. At least, not when it comes to you. I wish you didn’t as well. I so wish you didn’t change on me. I wish you don’t stare at her longingly - I know you once did with me.
It hurts to know you wanted us to end, and you let us end.
I lost you. I know I did. Perhaps a long time ago. I wish I didn’t. I wish I can still talk to you like before, I wish you’d still talk to me like before, I wish I still have that go-to-guy in you. Oh, how I want you to still want that.
But maybe you don’t. Maybe you don’t care at all. Maybe it’s ok for you that things between us are like this.
I want to hold you. I remember what it was like to be wrapped in your arms. I wish for it now. I still want to hold you now. I wish I can embrace you and stay there.
There’s still a dull ache in my heart. It still hurts. I still miss you. I still want us.